1. Why is it whenever you’re doing something somebody would ask, “What are you doing?” when he or she obviously knows and sees what you’re doing?
-Is he or she just playing dumb? Or he or she’s really that dumb? Or has that line become the new start to a conversation or an intro instead of saying “Hi”, “Hello”, “How are you?” and other greetings?
2. Why is it when you ask some guys about what type of girl they prefer they would usually say, “Simple?” Then, when a hot chick wearing mini skirt and flirty top passes by they would drool like rabid dogs? What happened to simplicity? Define ‘simple’ you guys.
–It seems their definition of ‘simple’ considering the way they act, defies both the denotation and connotation meaning. And just in case you’re not familiar with terms ‘denotation’ and ‘connotation’, here’s a short definition: Denotation- dictionary meaning. Connotation- in addition to denotation. I just learned them myself from Technical Writing (Eng4).
3. Why is it whenever a teacher announces that there would be a test next meeting a student would ask, “Ma’am will we have a test tomorrow?”
–For Pete’s sake! She just announced it!
4. Why is it when someone bites his or her tongue, he or she asks somebody for a number, designates that number to an alphabet letter, recalls a person whose name starts with that letter, and then blames that person for the injury?
–What? Could it be that person actually practices witchcraft and curses you to bite your tongue?
5. Why is sneezing considered by some people as a signal that somebody is talking about you or remembers you?
–Hmmm…probably that person was talking loudly about you that the sound waves he or she produces bombarded the plants, causing them to shake so hard, the pollens from the flowers flew. Incidentally, those pollens went into your nose and made you sneeze. And hey, if you slipped or trampled, I guess it was also caused by that person because his or her sound waves shook the road as well.
6. Why is it when somebody yawns, you would yawn too?
–Is it contagious? Or you just like to mimic the yawn? Or you already feel sleepy you forgot to yawn until you saw someone who did it?
7. Why do some people say “Xerox” instead of “Photocopy”?
–‘Xerox’ has fewer syllables than ‘Photocopy’.
8. Why do some girls can’t stop the urge to keep on reflecting themselves any chance they get; be it on mirrors, car windows, glass buildings or walls?
–It is because they’re so fond of themselves that they couldn’t resist seeing their reflection. They even chant to themselves, “Mirror mirror on the (suitable object of reflection here). Who’s the fairest of us all? ME MEE MEEEEE! Nyahahah!”
9. Why is it that whenever a gal had her hair cut short, somebody would usually conclude that she’s broken-hearted?
–Was Rapunzel broken-hearted when her hair got cut? No. She even married the prince and they lived happily ever after. Anyway, maybe it’s because hopeless romantic girls try to symbolize the length of their hair to the deepness of their love. So, when it’s cut down the deepness becomes shallow. Oh well. Rapunzel probably had a hair extension after that.
10. Why is it that after a long session of making noise there would be a short moment where everybody shuts up, then out of the blue, somebody would comment, “And there was silence,” and there goes the noise again?
–Everyone gets tired. They were all, at the same time, talking and laughing so loud for too long that they felt the need to relax their vocal chords and so, decided to shut up.
11. Why is it that when someone sees a friend or acquaintance walking together with the opposite sex, he or she coughs?
–It must be caused by an undiscovered virus named the love bug that causes people to cough uncontrollably. They must have that checked or else they will get pneumonia. On a lesser note, they might just want a candy with their cough.
(Philippine Context) 12. Why is it that there’s only a white lady and no white gentleman to scare us?
–Duh! White gentleman sounds weird! Imagine this: “Dude there’s a white gentleman! Let’s run for our lives!!!!” O_o
Comments